Nothing to say

I suppose a few of you don’t already know that I’m a Buddhist.  I grew up Christian (though not really sure just what kind … protestant? methodist? episcopalian? lutheran? whatever), and basically still am.  I disagree almost completely with the church and most Christian texts that I’ve read, but overall, I still believe in God, and most of the stuff about Jesus.  I just feel like it’s mostly mythology, not at all different from Greek or Roman myths.  Noah, Neptune, Hercules, Sampson, whatever.  Neither is really better or worse than the other as that goes.  They’re all interesting, and they all teach us valuable lessons.  They just can’t be taken as history.  They’re parables.

So, back to Buddhism.  The first great misconception is that it’s a religion.  It’s not.  It’s not even spitirual, really.  It’s more of a philosophy, as near as I can tell.  Of course, I’m still learning about it.  But I’ve read through most of the basic concepts, and they really resonate for me.

So last weekend, Feb 23-25, we went to Marywood, a Catholic retreat center near Switzerland, FL, west of St. Augustine.  It was a beautiful place, full of warm, welcoming people.  We were there for “Engaged Encounter”, which is a weekend that all couples (at least all couples marrying in the St. Augustine Diocese) must attend.  I think we were the only couple there who didn’t technically *have* to be there.  It was an awesome weekend, well spent discussing all of the things we’ve already discussed in a very structured manner.  We didn’t have enough time to really cover everything, but in our case, it was review, so it didn’t really matter.  The one wrench in the gears was the sheet we did about the “covenant” of marriage.  All the questions talked about religion, God, spirituality, etc.  Well, Kia’s not Christian at all, so we’re not going to be together for the glory of God or anything.  I think God’s cool with that, so it’s all good with me.  The thing is that I don’t really know how to reconcile our relationship, or moreover, my life with spirituality right now.

It was filling out my lame, half-assed, scatter-brained answers to that sheet that I realized I really need to read more.

And so it was last night that I picked up Kia’s copy of A Buddhist Bible.  It, like the Christian Bible, is a collection of stories and teachings.  It does not profess to meet exactly the same function as any other bible, but it does meet the more general definition of the word.  And even though I’m only on page, what, 20?, it’s great.  The Enlightened One, himself, didn’t believe in the soul.  So that’s sort of a discrepancy for me.  But the tenets of Buddhism don’t really have anthing more to say on the subject that I’ve seen.  They just entirely omit the subject of souls, afterlife, and other such things.

So Buddhism doesn’t compete with Christianity, because it doesn’t really give thought to the afterlife (so far),

And Christianity doesn’t compete with Buddhism, because the only advice they have for this life is to live it well, and do well by others.

So really, there’s no conflict at all.

Now, I just need to be consistent about reading and processing and thinking about things.

On another (somewhat related) subject, I figured out one of my total blocks to learning: I start applying things to my life the minute I see or hear them.  In beginning so early my processing of what I hear, I deny myself the attention and focus to pay attention to each subsequent thing.  When I enter a new place, I’m too busy tying it to myself that I don’t notice many details.  In conversations or reading, I stop listening so that I can wrap myself up in it and begin formulating my response.  These are inherently selfish things, and I’m looking forward to the day I stop doing them.  For now, I feel very happy that I’ve observed it.  Having made that observation, now, I can’t but apply it to my life.  Now, when I am reading, I catch myself thinking too soon, and I go back to read the paragraph again.

I still haven’t figured out how to simply absorb things, but I know it will click one day, and I will immediately be a better learner.

Life is quite busy now, so I’m getting to bed.  Thank you for letting me share with you.